)spunky4u's Recent Statuses
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Tue, 23-Apr-24 10:54 AM (16 minutes ago)
If anyone gets a message from me about canned meat don't open it! It's spam. 
Mon, 22-Apr-24 10:58 AM (1 day ago)
waiter: How do you like your steak cooked? Me: Like winning an argument with my wife. Waiter: Rare it is!🤪
A cowboy asked his friend for help rounding up 18 cows. His friend said “That’s 20.”
(23 hours ago)
Sun, 21-Apr-24 11:53 AM (1 day ago)
Every morning I take my cow on a long walk through the local vineyard, that's right I herd it through the grapevine. 
Sat, 20-Apr-24 11:01 AM (3 days ago)
I pointed at two old drunks sitting across the bars from us and said to my friend "that's us in 10 years" he said "that's a mirror dipshit."
Fri, 19-Apr-24 10:29 AM (4 days ago)
I accidentally pass my wife a glue stick instead of her chapstick, she's still not talking to me.🤪
If I were you, spunky, I'd find alternative living arrangements.
(3 days ago)
Thu, 18-Apr-24 11:15 AM (4 days ago)
Breaking news: A man was admitted to the hospital today with 25 toy horses inserted in his ass. Doctors have described his condition as stable! 
Wed, 17-Apr-24 11:17 AM (5 days ago)
I once bought a dog from a blacksmith. When I got him home he made a bolt for the door!
Tue, 16-Apr-24 11:02 AM (7 days ago)
I didn't mean to push all your buttons....just your mute button!
Mon, 15-Apr-24 10:18 AM (8 days ago)
I named my toilet "Jim" in stead of "John" Everyone is so impressed when I tell them I go to the Jim at least once a day!
Sun, 14-Apr-24 10:28 AM (9 days ago)
If you don't drink, how will your friends know you love them at 2 am?😛
"Tomorrow i will be sober, but you will still be [insert one or more] ugly. old. bitch. maggot. moron. twot. stupid. " ~ Wodja 2020 
(8 days ago)
Sat, 13-Apr-24 10:10 AM (10 days ago)
My neighbor suggested I put cow manure on my strawberries. Tired it, I'm going back to whipped cream.🤢
Fri, 12-Apr-24 10:36 AM (11 days ago)
I tried to remarry my ex-wife but she figured out I was only after my money. 
Thu, 11-Apr-24 11:26 AM (11 days ago)
My wife told me her password is: MickeyMinnieGoffyDonaldPlotoHueyLouieDeweyDublin...because sheh was told her password had to contain 8 characters and at least one Capital.
Wed, 10-Apr-24 10:20 AM (13 days ago)
The inventor of autocorrect died, the funnel will be held tomato.
Tue, 9-Apr-24 10:54 AM (14 days ago)
Wife: "I'm going to donate all my old clothes to starving people" Husband: "If they're starving they won't fit into your clothes" ...funeral on Friday.
Mon, 8-Apr-24 10:53 AM (15 days ago)
Son: "Dad can you explain to me what a solor eclipse is?" Dad: "No son"
Sun, 7-Apr-24 10:36 AM (16 days ago)
i asked my wife why she married me. She said "because your are funny." I said I thought it was because i was good in bed." she said "See, you're hilarious!"
Male ego is so easily pricked. So to speak ☺️
Fri, 5-Apr-24 9:55 AM (18 days ago)
The difference between men and women simply comes down to what comes to mind when you hear the word facial.
Thu, 4-Apr-24 11:07 AM (19 days ago)
Sign on a Restaurant marque: We trimmed our bush so now our deck looks bigger!
Wed, 3-Apr-24 10:29 AM (20 days ago)
Strange sign in a parking lot: Parking available in empty spaces only🤪
Tue, 2-Apr-24 10:48 AM (21 days ago)
Say this on a Jimmy Johns marque "Our subs are an honest 8 inches even when it's cold outside"
meat?? where??
Sat, 30-Mar-24 11:27 AM (23 days ago)
Why am I the only naked person at the gender reveal party??
